The
wonderful tradition of buying the bride and groom personalised wedding
gifts originates from dowries, when the bride's father gave money or
gifts to his future son-in-law and family.These
days, we’ve developed the rather more enjoyable practice of showering
the happy couple with wedding gifts, but with this new etiquette of
giving and receiving there comes a maze of questions. Some people feel
embarrassed to ask for wedding presents; others are offended if the
bride and groom don’t want to be given anything. And what exactly
should a couple be asking for?Don’t
forget that the happy couple are also expected to give presents, often
called favours, for their guests. These serve two purposes -- as well
as saying thank you, they can go far in creating beautiful table
settings.So here’s our complete buyer’s guide to gifts, gift lists and tables settings.
Your wedding gift list
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Wedding
gift lists are one of the highlights of planning a wedding -- what can
be more fun than compiling a list of wedding gifts/presents for
yourself? But they're hugely practical too, providing an excellent way
of making sure you get the gifts/presents you really want and need.
Why choose a gift list?
The
difficulty many couples face is balancing the desire of your guests,
who want their personally chosen wedding gifts to be appreciated, with
your desire to receive presents that you really want and need. No one
needs five ring cushions and seven garters, so a simple, practical way
of receiving what you want is by setting up a wedding gift list.
Those
wishing to buy you a wedding gift can then choose something they know
is needed and will be appreciated. It is important to remember that
there is nothing wrong or presumptuous with having a wedding gift list.
It is only considered bad taste if you try to force your wedding list
onto your guests.
For a full gift list service, go to specialkeepsakes.co.uk
A
traditional list involves you compiling your own list and distributing
it to those who ask to see it. You should include the manufacturer's
name, model and colour of whatever items you’ve asked for. When your
guests have chosen a gift, it is returned with that item crossed off.
Since your invitations will have been posted 8 to 12 weeks before your
wedding day there will be plenty of time for your list to do the
rounds. It is traditional that the host (usually the bride's mother)
handles and circulates the wedding gift list.
Department store gift lists
A
far more popular way of handling gift lists is by using the services of
a particular shop or department store. Most major stores such as Marks
& Spencer, Debenhams and House of Fraser provide a wedding list
service, where you make up your list from their stock. As part of the
service, the store will manage your wedding list so when your guests
telephone, buy online or visit the store, the item chosen is removed
from your list. After your wedding, the store will send you a list of
who has purchased what so you know who to send your thank-you letters
to.
Online gift lifts
Many companies and traditional
department stores now offer online wedding gift lists, a hugely
practical and popular alternative. The greatest benefit is that you can
compile your personalised wedding list from the comfort of your home,
saving you the time of browsing around a store. Once you have made your
selection, you can usually either create a list online, or mail your
choices to them and they will set it up for you. Your guests,
meanwhile, can also save the trouble of a trip or phone call and can
browse your list online.